ever been so giddy and excited that you feel like you're going to explode?
yeah.
that's me when i'm outside.
so much to say and so much to feel, it's wonderful...
just wonderful...
no way to express it except to take your shoes off and run around in the new green grass, stand in it feeling the cool ground with your toes and with your head turned to the sky feeling the cool breeze brush against your face...
going to camp tomorrow, CPR re-certification, shall be fun to see a lot of the returning staff, some of my favorite people :)
i don't really get to do that much at camp... run around barefoot and such... yet it's a good balance for me, spend all day being out there and myself, helping the campers and being there for them, talking to the other counselors, being in my element... and then when the campers are asleep i'm on my own for a few hours, or having a good, real conversation with another counselor or a volunteer. camp out nights spending time around the fire... gazing at the stars... walking to the dining hall on monday morning by myself... being outside all day, even if i'm with people... trying to get the campers to see nature, even if they don't feel it as deeply as i do... talking to the site director...
haha, his wife told my mom not to tell me, but i'm one of their favorite people.
ten more years and they retire, sad day...
yet knowing them, they won't leave before then.
i know the site director better than his wife...
he's there for the camp, the kids...
so am i...
yet for other selfish reasons aswell, like being outside...
i wish words could decribe the high of outside,
but until then there's naught but feeling.
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