today someone at church asked if they could ask me a personal question.
'are you adopted? we were just wondering, because i mean, if not then where do you get your figure?'
of course, two weeks ago this person asked where my boyfriend was (this was met with crickets from my church family... how long ago was that? he visited in january? it ended a month later?) she had thought i brought him more recently than that.
she went on to just wonder at how i was so thin but she did mention that my mom 'isn't any fatter' than she was.
i suppose that's just something i've never addressed in my life other than not wanting to end up that way.
i believe 'what, didn't they feed you when you were younger?' was also brought up...
of course, this person also said to my mom 'doesn't she eat anything? do you keep it all for yourself?'
some people are oblivious i suppose...
i do find the adoption question ironic in lieu of the crazy dreams i had about me suddenly discovering that i was Sabretooth's, or Creed's, daughter and my own parents somehow unknowingly adopted me.
all of that sprung from me noting my hair was similar to his, or so i'm assuming.
crazy dreams, needless to say.
there was a lot of speculation about why i wasn't like he was.
'well, Creed has a mind of his own. so does she.'
it was nice to talk to nightcrawler however... i should read more of his comics. or any.
*in other news, i got to hear about sightings of how the guy i dated seems pushy, selfish, whiny, or commanding and his girlfriend seems helpless... or at least doesn't have a will of her own.
and i'm wondering how i hear whisperings of their make-out sessions in the most random places.
i should work harder on turning my ears off when i hear people whispering.
*sigh*
fun things to hear. yeah.
i am rejoicing in their faults.
no.
then how is it that i feel they rejoice in my faults?
my mom has been hinting that i need to go the 'i kissed dating goodbye' route.
meh.
how about i just listen to the voice in my head that says 'i don't want him to be the one' if it's there?
not like i date a lot anyway, once in the past twenty years and even then it was only a couple of months.
she also would say weird things to me like 'you know, mature people know that you fall in and out of love with people in marriage.'
okay mom...
what are you telling me here...?
i realize you had more dates and guy friends and crushes than i, i know that you were married before and you left that guy because he had a drinking problem and other issues that i won't ask you about, but don't expect me to find a guy anytime soon.
or a guy to find me, rather.
*random
i suppose i was too much of a brick wall for him.
i had a will of my own and believe in compromise but not giving in.
...and don't assume i'm saying 'yeah, this is 100% what i believe and i'm pinpointing this as my exact point of view.'
i can speculate and explore a perspective with sarcasm and not hold what i'm saying as true, thank you very much.
/end few sentences of girl that is now paranoid about saying things because they'll be set in stone and assumed about.
other random:
all throughout my 'daughter of creed' escapades, no matter how strong i was or how good the cause, it was always, always difficult for me to hurt someone.
i could understand the need to kill certain people but i couldn't do it, leave that to wolverine or someone else.
but not me.
perhaps not couldn't, but wouldn't... definitely.
ha.
leave it to me to have a dream where i end up supported and raised by a lot of mentors...
people to look up to.
learn from.
older siblings, persay.
well, one can dream.
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