seeing some of my favorite people was wonderful...
apparently all summer the old site director has been saying 'i need to see Lindsay, Lindsay's my girl!'
^_^
i got the invitation text and literally danced all over the cabin when he said that he missed me and hoped i could make it. he thanked me for helping with 'his' camp...
and mentioned that he didn't miss the 'bs' of the conference.
don't blame him there.
...'conference' people remind me of the guy i dated.
and to me he now seems profusely shallow and arrogant.
not seems, is.
but what can i say, he's a murderer and i was an accessory in the crime.
assisting in my own murder, so was this an assisted suicide or was it...
no, i'm guilty of involuntary self-manslaughter.
stupid of me regardless.
yeah, this year will be a bed of roses.
...curious how a 'bed of roses' is supposed to be a good thing.
sounds painful.
perhaps it implies only the petals...?
yet petals are never attained without the thorns.
...that metaphor has nothing to do with the following random topic.
random:
the people that were invited to the fish fry (new site director, wranglers, two cooks, lifeguard, office help, i was the only counselor) were all worried about me...
...because they didn't know how i'd react if he drank, which he did. and his brother. and his nephew. and the current site director did. and the wrangler that was my first counselor did.
in all reality, i didn't mind.
james had mentioned it to me while we were at walmart (at that time he said he probably wouldn't drink. suppose he was still nervous about me being there?)
my replay was simply that i know and accept that some people i admire and look up to drink.
it's not my life or my decision for them; just because i plan on never drinking doesn't mean people can't do that around me.
just please don't get wasted around me.
which no one did.
i enjoyed just sitting around, talking...
and on the upside; one of the wrangler's bourbon and sierra mist mixes was a great idea because then i had sierra mist.
straight up sierra mist; no one but me was tough enough to take that!
once most everyone was gone we started talking more camp...
about the program director that puts on a show and other such things...
apparently i'm not the only one to notice the 'conference' people are different...
i found it uncanny that many had the same terminology as i did when describing the situation.
random:
i think that when i mentioned today to mom that some people were drinking there that she grew as a parent...
later in the day she said that it was fine if i hung out with people like that; the people i was with were trustworthy enough to have designated drivers to get the people that were drinking back to camp, it was fine.
at first i think she was startled but saw nothing wrong with it; later she accepted it.
other random:
whenever they cussed and remembered that i was there they apologized...
mom never ever does that.
they did.
hmm.
it was odd to hear 'sorry linds' after someone said something; i appreciated the apology but wondered about the reasons behind it...
at anyrate, that began a discussion about one of the wranglers just wanting to hear me cut loose and cuss up a storm.
...mmm, no.
haha, it was fun last night...
discussing the propane tank and fires...
fishing...
life...
miss those people.
i was out until one, didn't get in until two-ish.
random:
this week i've been thinking about how i'm finally finishing the foundations of myself.
finished rebuilding.
within reason of course...
you never finish building.
yet listening to alabama blaring from my ipod as i cleaned up the camp from my second summer of work, a camp that i first went to as an invisible and worthless kid... it just comes full circle.
haha, listening to so much country the past two days reminds me of going to hockey games with dad... back before he started listening to kutless and whatnot.
i miss those days...
yet at the same time i don't...
...it really was full circle wasn't it...
isn't it...
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